Life seems to be so dramatic at times..
Not trying to make things big..
But i feel so these few days..

Trying to stay positive alone is so difficult..
Glad that i have so many God sent angels to be with me..

Just when i was about to give up volleyball for good, God spoke to me..
Through my team mates, who cared for me..
And through the game with IK last Sunday..
Was really stunned that i was chosen to start the game and last all 4 sets of it..

YeeLin was the one who talked me through everything..
She encouraged me, spurred me on..
Supported and encouraged the whole team..

Somehow i felt that when everything is all so right..
Shitty things just got to happen..
Mum wasn't happy when i mentioned about JB trip for Malaysian Opens..
She thought i was lying about it so that i can go and play or fool around..
That led to many other issues..
I'm not here to complain, but i just couldn't see eye to eye with on these issues.
Like:

Studies.. I was blamed for being lousy at my studies, Mum even warned me that if i would to fail again, I'll just have to stop schooling.. (apparently my efforts wasn't acknowledged by her in anyway)

Volleyball.. She felt that i was putting my priority in volleyball..
Yes i did. I used to do that. But i no longer can.. Reducing to only attending my volleyball matches now..
I'm only trying my best at the passion that lives inside me..

Work was affected too.. Because i was too occupied with many things..
She felt that i'm always not at home..
Not doing my part in the family, looking after Sunny, not around to be "seen" much at home
So bad that i have to quite my job with MDS and probably further reducing the amount of volleyball time in order to be at home more and to be seen.

To Joe & Geo:

So sorry that because of my personal reasons, i have to stop working with you guys.
I've really enjoyed and took pride with what i did with MDS. Thankful that you both have been concerned and willing to teach me so much. I really felt bad for not committing as long as i could. But i felt that was the only way to please my family. Hope that you both will not take it to heart.
Thanks so much for understanding =)

I haven't gave up on going JB..
Dad was supportive.. But he told me to try not to go for it so as not to upset my mum again..

Well.. maybe parents do have their own reasons in doing things their way..
As children, we can only try to follow as they wished..
But would we lose our character at the same time?
I wish not.. And hope that I'll be acknowledged that I'm already a grown up.
A mature person who can decide things on her own, by herself, but of cause with the support of my loved ones..

God please guide me..

I pray....


p/s: yeelin, cindy, baby, gp: thanks for hearing all my rants and standing by me..